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…place and it shall bear another name.’ “I nodded, understanding his feelings. ‘So be it then,’ I said. “Thus passes a fair city of Men.’ Turning then to my esquire,…

…do you want! Telemarketer: How would you like to buy- Legolas: No! *hangs up* The phone rings Legolas: Screw Telemarketers!*slams phone down* The phone rings. Legolas: I hate you morons!…

…but handed back the stupidly pink cell phone to Arwen. Arwen squealed with delight and immediately made the phone start playing “Every Time” by Brittany Spears. “Stop that confounded music,…

…um, I guess it’s probably about three hours behind us. VOICES: Thank you! Line goes dead. Elrond stares at phone. Phone stares at Elrond. Elrond drops phone down onto his…

…the phone from a complaining Denny and called Theoden on his cell phone. “WHERE ARE YOU??” Gandalf yelled into the phone. “We’re close. Getting closer. Can you hear me now?”…

…long to do your hair!? Legolas: No, Sam: Good… Legolas: 10 hours for my hair.. *runs off* Frodo: *is now very happy because he is so attractive from his hair*…

…fire-walls on our computers to stop the Viral Spam from being accepted by our inboxes?” “That’s a good idea!” says Gandalf, “Does anyone have an e-mail address or phone number…

…in the largest, shiniest chair he had ever seen. He was eating caviar and lobster and talking up a storm. “Hey, Mr. Hoho, you aren’t too bad an actor!” said…

…Sam in a boat) *** ELROND: Reason number 567 why you shouldn’t marry Aragorn: I don’t like him. ARWEN: I had not noticed. ELROND: Reason number 4,109 why you shouldn’t…

…whipped out a travel-sized can of hair spray, and a dainty mirror. He also grabbed a tiny comb and carefully smoothed down his hair and then sprayed the entire can…