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Smaug’s Solution (in Fanfiction)

…there. Galadriel: Bug off. Aragorn: (goes to the phone and dials Smaug’s number, looks around to see if anyone is watching, but Legolas and Boromir have everyone’s attention as they…

Gandalf Gets Promoted (in Fanfiction)

…and Rosie is still on the floor, unconcious. Pippin: Oh, my cell phone! (He answers it) Hello? Yes, this is he. Oh, boy! (He hangs up his cell phone.) Merry:…

The Lord of the Teeth – The Frenetic of the Teeth (in Subject Articles)

The Lord of the Teeth – The Frenetic of the Teeth Written by Air of Mystery Dramatis Personae: The Characters. Blowdry Naggins: The hero and Teethbearer. Enjoys breakdancing. Spamwise Grouchee:…

The Fellowship of the Ring at the White House (in Fanfiction)

…discuss the ring! Senator E: Don’t be silly, we already fixed the vice-presidents phone. Sam:(standing up and pulling out a frying pan.) Don’t you be funny with Mister Frodo!! Senator…

A Phone Call with Elrond PART TWO (in Fanfiction)

…for a minute, then: BOROMIR: I saw this really awesome movie the other day- MEANWHILE… Elrond is trying to turn on phone. ELROND: For the love of Elbereth!! Turn on!!…

FotR: The Quest for World Domination Episode II (in Fanfiction)

…~hobbitluver~: *sighs* Alright, fine. Somebody bring me a phone! The employee brings a phone to ~hobbitluver~. She answers it on speakerphone. ~hobbitluver~: Yeah, whaddaya want? A childish voice on the…

The Commandeering of the Cursed Aztec Gold Ring With a Black Pearl (in Fanfiction)

…of the orc…and also the weight ratio of the hobbit to orc… and if you calculate the amount of hair on his toes times the amount of hair on his…

Chapter 11: Diplomacy (in Fanfiction)

…“We need tickets to The Black Gate. Russia.” She raised her hand and stared at her fingernails. “CanÂ’t help you.” “I think you can,” Fred said. “I think I canÂ’t.”…

The Funniship of the Ring (in Subject Articles)

…in the largest, shiniest chair he had ever seen. He was eating caviar and lobster and talking up a storm. “Hey, Mr. Hoho, you aren’t too bad an actor!” said…

LotR4: Attack of the Spammers (in Fanfiction)

…fire-walls on our computers to stop the Viral Spam from being accepted by our inboxes?” “That’s a good idea!” says Gandalf, “Does anyone have an e-mail address or phone number