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…discuss the ring! Senator E: Don’t be silly, we already fixed the vice-presidents phone. Sam:(standing up and pulling out a frying pan.) Don’t you be funny with Mister Frodo!! Senator…

…for a minute, then: BOROMIR: I saw this really awesome movie the other day- MEANWHILE… Elrond is trying to turn on phone. ELROND: For the love of Elbereth!! Turn on!!…

…~hobbitluver~: *sighs* Alright, fine. Somebody bring me a phone! The employee brings a phone to ~hobbitluver~. She answers it on speakerphone. ~hobbitluver~: Yeah, whaddaya want? A childish voice on the…

…phone) Gandalf speaking. What’s your problem Boromir? (pause) hold on, I can’t hear you! Boromir: Can you hear me now? Gandalf: What? Boromir: (louder) Can you hear me now? Gandalf:…

…tickets to Disney World for two days. It wasn’t the entering that bothered Aragorn, it was the winning. “Arwen, I can’t survive two more days at Disney World!” Aragorn said,…

…particularly large one with orange-green scales leaped up onto the right parapet and drew back his scimitar for a stroke at Isildur as he passed. Isildur was turned to his…

Orckies and Evil Minions This is Mordor number 5 One, two, three, four, five Everybody on the Nazgul, so come on let’s ride To the Green Dragon around the corner…

Elrond finishes up coucil, sits down in chair and sighs. ELROND: This has not been my day. Suddenly, flash of light from behind him makes him turn and get out…

ELROND: Hey, that’s an insult! MIRANDA: Sorry. ELROND (casually): Soooo, what’s gonna happen in the…War of the Ring, did you say? MIRANDA: I’m not going to tell you! You’d ruin…