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The Return of the Fellowship of the Two Towers of the King’s Ring (in Subject Articles)

…Sam in a boat) *** ELROND: Reason number 567 why you shouldn’t marry Aragorn: I don’t like him. ARWEN: I had not noticed. ELROND: Reason number 4,109 why you shouldn’t…

Queer Eye for the Straight Guy… REVERSED: Chapter Four (in Fanfiction)

phone away from Arwen, but she clung tighter. “NO, THIS IS MY FAVORITE PART!” she yelled, but Sam had clicked off her cell phone. Arwen sobbed, hysterically. “How could you…

Smaug’s Solution (in Fanfiction)

…there. Galadriel: Bug off. Aragorn: (goes to the phone and dials Smaug’s number, looks around to see if anyone is watching, but Legolas and Boromir have everyone’s attention as they…

Gandalf Gets Promoted (in Fanfiction)

…and Rosie is still on the floor, unconcious. Pippin: Oh, my cell phone! (He answers it) Hello? Yes, this is he. Oh, boy! (He hangs up his cell phone.) Merry:…

The Silver Scepter: The Return of Sauron (in Fanfiction)

…the short slope is the Outer city, lined with orderly streets and centers with homes, businesses, and markets along the roads. The outer city was by many means larger than…

The Fellowship of the Ring at the White House (in Fanfiction)

…discuss the ring! Senator E: Don’t be silly, we already fixed the vice-presidents phone. Sam:(standing up and pulling out a frying pan.) Don’t you be funny with Mister Frodo!! Senator…

A Phone Call with Elrond PART TWO (in Fanfiction)

…for a minute, then: BOROMIR: I saw this really awesome movie the other day- MEANWHILE… Elrond is trying to turn on phone. ELROND: For the love of Elbereth!! Turn on!!…

FotR: The Quest for World Domination Episode II (in Fanfiction)

…~hobbitluver~: *sighs* Alright, fine. Somebody bring me a phone! The employee brings a phone to ~hobbitluver~. She answers it on speakerphone. ~hobbitluver~: Yeah, whaddaya want? A childish voice on the…

The Commandeering of the Cursed Aztec Gold Ring With a Black Pearl (in Fanfiction)

…a miracle Bilbo and Elrond: Bye bye! * Trying to cross mountains* Boromir: This will be the death of the hobbits! Gandalf: What?! (cell phone rings, LOTR ring tone) Legolas:…

Chapter 8 (in Fanfiction)

…This city has no walls, and is no fortress.” “It might take a while to empty the whole city, Radagast,” explained Yamagata, “not to mention that we might have to…