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Queer Eye for the Straight Guy… REVERSED: Chapter Four (in Fanfiction)

phone away from Arwen, but she clung tighter. “NO, THIS IS MY FAVORITE PART!” she yelled, but Sam had clicked off her cell phone. Arwen sobbed, hysterically. “How could you…

Smaug’s Solution (in Fanfiction)

…there. Galadriel: Bug off. Aragorn: (goes to the phone and dials Smaug’s number, looks around to see if anyone is watching, but Legolas and Boromir have everyone’s attention as they…

Gandalf Gets Promoted (in Fanfiction)

…and Rosie is still on the floor, unconcious. Pippin: Oh, my cell phone! (He answers it) Hello? Yes, this is he. Oh, boy! (He hangs up his cell phone.) Merry:…

The Fellowship of the Ring at the White House (in Fanfiction)

…discuss the ring! Senator E: Don’t be silly, we already fixed the vice-presidents phone. Sam:(standing up and pulling out a frying pan.) Don’t you be funny with Mister Frodo!! Senator…

A Phone Call with Elrond PART TWO (in Fanfiction)

…for a minute, then: BOROMIR: I saw this really awesome movie the other day- MEANWHILE… Elrond is trying to turn on phone. ELROND: For the love of Elbereth!! Turn on!!…

FotR: The Quest for World Domination Episode II (in Fanfiction)

…~hobbitluver~: *sighs* Alright, fine. Somebody bring me a phone! The employee brings a phone to ~hobbitluver~. She answers it on speakerphone. ~hobbitluver~: Yeah, whaddaya want? A childish voice on the…

The Commandeering of the Cursed Aztec Gold Ring With a Black Pearl (in Fanfiction)

…a miracle Bilbo and Elrond: Bye bye! * Trying to cross mountains* Boromir: This will be the death of the hobbits! Gandalf: What?! (cell phone rings, LOTR ring tone) Legolas:…

Isildur, a novel (in Fanfiction)

…But now our neighbors are our friends. And we Eredrim have not been idle. We number nearer a hundred thousands now, and we have villages in every bay of the…

Mordor Number 5 (in Karaoke Songs)

Orckies and Evil Minions This is Mordor number 5 One, two, three, four, five Everybody on the Nazgul, so come on let’s ride To the Green Dragon around the corner…

How Gimli and a Drunken Hobbit Saved Christmas (3 chapters) (in Fanfiction)

…Legolas for one of Santa’s minions had put fake reindeer antlers on Brego and Arod and had hitched them to a bright red sleigh, bells and all as an early…